A New Dawn, A New Day, A New City and I'm Feeling Good

As I sit here a reflect on my past blogs I can see the growth in both my writing and my life. I am blessed to have finished Spelman College and embark on this new horizon to Boston College for my M.Ed in Curriculum and Instruction, Program: Elementary Education. I have has a wonderful summer taking classes with my cohort, 31 other wonderful, educated, enlightened and dedicated individuals who have taken on the challenge of being a Donovan! The Donovan Program (my graduate school program) is a one year, INTENSIVE, program for urban educators. I really do not have to say any more about the hearts of these brilliant individuals since I have now told you they have agreed to take on the noblest job imagined, an urban educator.

Since I could write a dissertation about the plight of public education and I only have about 11 minutes before I need to get moving, I will only share a few more words with you in the hopes that this will be as vivid as all my other blogs. Moving to Boston has been an eye opener. I have met wonderful people, seen many things, good and bad, and look forward to the day that I can write about my new destination, because I can honestly say that I do not feel this is my last stop. I love Boston but I think Georgia is calling me home and I've been calling it home for the last four years. My origin is Buffalo, NY and I love it with all my heart, especially those gifted Bills, but I need to find the place I want to plant my roots. This is my next journey and I look forward to my year as Boston College and the adventures ahead in Bean Town! Until next time.......

To Old Friends, New Friends and Great Escapes.....

"We are fun, interesting, young and single," were the words of Keisha (Lisaraye McCoy) in a preview for an upcoming episode of Single Ladies. The first episode was full of drama, suspense, romance and ironically: men. These single ladies, well, somewhat single, are in for a season full of fun. Val (Stacey Dash), rid herself of a loveless and stagnant relationship of five years, Keisha is the ex-video dancer/professional manizer, and April (Charity Shea) is married with a side of Mayor (Common). From the all star cast and cameo appearances (Eve, Chili, Jermaine Dupri, Kandi just to name a few), this two-hour fiasco held viewers attention through the commercials. Each week I will attempt to update my blog regarding the sizzling summer series known as Single Ladies. This show will be my summer fling. I have loved the first episode and from the previews I realize that the best is yet to come.

Now, although I can blog about this episode of single ladies from now until the next week, I would be keeping myself from getting other things done. So this week, and probably every week to follow, I will extract a topic that I am interested in that was presented in the show, blog about it, ask a few friends their perspective, and report back. This will keep the blog easy to read, and give the opinion of others.

This episode is the only one that will be the exception. I will most likely blog about it all week long, strictly because of its length. The topic that was of my most interest was introduced in the first five minutes of the melodrama. Keisha's boy toy (Woody) said that, "A guy knows in the first 15 minutes of spending time with a woman, whether he would marry her or not he would ever marry her." This is a dangerous statement. 15 minutes. 25% of a hour. quarter past, and you already know if you would put a ring on it. How does that man behave. Is there a time limit on that ring? will it ever come? These are the burning questions of women across the world. I asked myself the same question and it was true, but only to a certain extent. I know if I could ever allow myself to care for that person to eventually reach marriage. Is 15 minutes enough time to determine the rest of your life?

Single Ladies

The story of Keisha, Val and April, three women living in Atlanta, will air tomorrow on VH1. Although the lives depicted are pure fiction I can not help but think that it has been written with some serious truth behind it. These women will represent a multitude of women in Atlanta and elsewhere. Single Ladies, a song by Beyonce, and the title that some women will have forever, single lady. There are a number of reasons, both voluntary and involuntary, that explain why some women are single and some have never been or will be. As a psychology student I am cognizant of the different factors in someones life that could lead them to be single, but we can not account for that as a primary cause. No one knows why, I, myself and a lot of my eligible friends are currently labeled as "Single Ladies" when we possess the qualities that men are seeing in a woman. I will examine a few theories that have been discussed and then move to seek an answer from all of you, if anyone ever chooses to read and respond.

Reason One: "Your too Young"

Age is often brought up as a reason for me still being single. My grandfather will often say, "you are too young to be thinking about such things" but he neglects to realize that I am only months away from my 21st birthday, and have friends that have surpassed that day by months themselves. On the other hand you have my younger family and friends who, on every encounter ask, "So you have a boyfriend now?", as if he would only serve as an ancillary to place on my key chain or tattoo on my neck. I used to agree with my grandfather but as the years pass it now seems to serve as a invalid reason for why I am single.

Reason Two: "All the good ones are either....."

Who hasn't heard the saying, "All the good ones are either taken of gay." This misconception about men has lead to infidelity, heartbreak and sadness. It is not that these men are increasing at a rat that keeps single women from men. These men have chosen titles that are distinct and as women, we must respect what they choose to identify as. By doing so, we also are helping other men embrace titles, or lifestyles while maintaining our own.

Reason Three: "Your standards are too high!"

Women with a list of standards are told they have too many. Women with no standards are those who people call loose and men expect women to fall on the pin drop in the middle. There is a large misconception between standards that women have and should have. Standards should not be physical features. Standards should fall in line with your moral character and interests. Women can never have too many standards, they just should not have the wrong standards.

There are a number of other reasons that women could and are single. I will continue to list them and give an update on Single Ladies as the season progresses. Single Ladies beware, life as we know it may soon change for the better!

You Wanna Make God Laugh

On December 24th 2010, it marked the 6th month since my last blog. I did not realize how much work goes into putting a blog together and keeping a blog recent but in conjunction with my school work it was not something that I saw plausible. I planned on starting, better yet, relaunching my blog on Jan 24th, with fresh start, a new beginning with so many different topics to talk about and discuss with, well honestly, myself and God since I don't think anyone else reads these things. But there is this one thing that I realized yesterday, as I was alerted to the fact that my Spelman Sister, Adrienne Bauduit, died. I realized that life is for the living, not for the waiting, or keeping of tabs, or stressing, or blaming, or hurting. We must live like it is our last, always being prepared in case that day does come but realizing that it is not guaranteed. Nothing in life is guaranteed.

Life is full of mistakes, slip-ups, pain, and heartache but we must remember that no one man is perfect. We must live perfectly imperfect with each other. Friendships, Relationships, Family, and even those we see as enemies, we must look beyond what we see as imperfect, stop judging those around us, and remember that we all have imperfections, and when the day comes that we can look beyond all those other peoples imperfections and love them, through it all, then we have reached a beautiful day, full of happiness and free of pain. I live to serve God, and others, with my love, peace, happiness and joy. I praise the Lord, with all my heart, and pray for the day that we can all come together, with peace, happiness and joy in our hearts. When love is blind to our outwardly expressed traits and based on a deeper connection, our hearts bound together. Love everyone, always.

So I say to you young friend, loving family member, or honest, and beautiful stranger, take time to thank God for his plan for you. He will always be there, to help you, to give you strength, and will never give you more than you can bear. God is an everlasting God. We cannot ask him why he does what he does but trust in the Lord that he knows what and why he does, and gives us enough strength to carry on. He never gives us more than we can bare, so let him guide you though your life, without worry, and with confidence that his word is true. And never for "If you want to make God laugh, tell him your plans."

Revelation

I havent blogged in a while. in fact its almost been an entire year since, but i didnt like to blog unless I had something powerful to convey to all the people who can read it. But the one thing I neglected to remember is that my blog is for me, to tell people my thoughts, even if its not in a coerrent manner, or set up all pretty, i can still affect the masses. So I will blog, whenever i feel like it, and people can read it if they like, but the most important thing is that its mine, just for me, to tell everyone, my thoughts, emotions and ideas. ji

that is all

I Will Remember You, But will they..........

As I sit here and reflect on 9/11/09, eight years after, all I can do is remember the heartbreak and chaos. I remember going to the bathroom during class and seeing my teachers watching the news and trying to figure out, the old age question, "what's Going On?". I can remember my principal making an announcement after I returned, and my mother panicking, and coming to get me from school because I was close to the Peace Bridge that leads to Canada. Americans were in panic and thought the entire country would soon be under attack, but little did we know we are. I myself could even understand the impact it was going to have on our country or all the lives that it would take and has not yet taken.

How can we forget thee importance of this day and go on with our lives as though it doesn't matter? I myself know that i am consumed with my life and need to sometimes take a step back to think about others and how my overwhelming ideas about me being number one is idiotic and lacks the potential for me to grow as an individual. Before I get too sidetracked, like most of us do let me revert back to the focus of today's blog, 911 and its the symbolic action and most importantly the reason to remember.

Eight years ago the country was in a uproar. They didn't know who to blame and they didn't know who to claim. But one thing that arose from 911, are the racial and cultural injustices' that those of the Muslim community now have to suffer with. One thing we need to learn from this is that we are not as safe as we think. there is always some way around things and if people want to find a way they can and they will. We must remember this day for all those who lost someone and are now serving a life sentence, similar to the one that my Spelman sister's mother is. A life taken too soon but at his will. We cannot argue with God, but instead ask him to lead us to understanding. For the will of the Lord is the final choice.

Summertime

With less then a month left before I pack up what I need for my next year at the prestigious Spelman College, I must take time to reflect on all the things that have happened this summer. I was blessed to be able to travel so much this summer. In addition to that I was also able to relax and to get a good sense of self. I got to explore my future and where i see myself going. I talked with professionals and even have figured out all the different things that i want to do. I am so glad that I have many people that love me and support me in everything I do.

When I came home I got to enjoy the luxury of waking up late, and mom's Saturday breakfast pretty much everyday of the week. I really like going to school so far away because when i come back I am truly appreciated.

Now on to the trips that I mentioned before. I have already been to West Virginia, Rochester, NY, and Chicago but this weekend I am lucky enough to be able to go to Miami. I am truly grateful and glad for all the trips I have enjoyed. Visiting family is something that we all need to do.

Now I must take time to acknowledge the Late King of Pop, Michael Jackson. I remember MJ as a wonderful and outstanding individual. He is not only a pop icon but a wonderful son father brother and friend. In my eyes he is one of the greatest that ever lived. Every time i think about it I cant believe that's it true.